Selfishness

I just wanted to write and share with all of you something that I have been learning about lately -- how selfish I am. It's actually quite easy to think highly of myself -- I stay home with my children, I homeschool my oldest, I make all of our food from scratch, etc., but I'm a sinner saved by grace. I've realized anew how often I struggle with that "old man" of sin.

"Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin." (Rom. 6:6)

When we went on vacation for Thanksgiving, I took along TWO bags full of books to read! I didn't actually think I'd read them all, I just wanted to be sure that I had a selection whenever the opportunity presented itself. I didn't know, for example, whether I'd be in the mood to read theology, history, history of education, a novel, parenting books, education books, a magazine....You get the picture.

By the way, this is where we've had the privilege of spending the last six Thanksgivings! Isn't it beautiful?



Well, my daughter, Energizer Bunny (EB), became ill on Wednesday night, and we had a long night. She ended up sleeping in my bed, with RR sleeping with Daddy and GB in his pack 'n' play. She was up every 15-30 minutes until 3 a.m. acting delirious. She would yell, say unitelligible words, stare at me, walk around, etc. and then just decide to lay back down. She finally slept until 5:45 when she woke up screaming hysterically. She was SO loud that my mother-in-law, sleeping next door, came running over to find out what had happened.

Because of all of that, we decided to limit her activity for the day and part of the next. So...no nice meals in the several dining rooms they had, but room service. No pool time, but reading aloud time. No hike in the beautiful Allegheny mountains, but coloring time. The list goes on and on.

Do you know what I remember most from all of this though? (I think I read a grand total of 3 verses in Genesis the entire vacation.) But I remember my daughter falling asleep in my arms, my daughter smiling at me when I whispered that I loved her, some one-on-one time with my daughter that is often neglected in the midst of homeschooling RR and tending to GB's many needs -- complimenting her coloring abilities and seeing her face light up as I exclaimed over her recognition of letters.

When we follow Christ, Who did not look "on his own things" but only "on the things of others", we reap a multitude of benefits that far surpass the temporal joys we are seeking. Would I remember the words of the books I read during Thanksgiving? Maybe, maybe not, but I don't think that I will soon forget the special one-on-one time that presented itself to my daughter and me. I don't think she will either.